Whine Begets Wine

My wife’s employer graciously allows her to work from home one day a week so she’s able to spend more time with the Twins, and although she’s asking them not to slam on her laptop’s keyboard for a good portion of the day, it’s better than not seeing them for most of the day. However, because she’s not home very often, we’ve noticed that when she is home, the Twins tend to be way more whiny than usual. Apparently, this is a thing with moms and kids–that kids act more needy around Mom than with Dad–as many of my wife’s friends with kids have reported the same phenomenon. I have to say, I feel fortunate to be the one they “man up” with instead of the one they cling to and whine at every five minutes.

This week, Mommy’s work-from-home day was especially challenging in the whining department, and once the kids were in bed for the night and we’d poured ourselves some wine, she offered a particularly eloquent reflection on the last 14 hours:

“I love being home with my kids. Except for when they drive me bananas.”
— My Wife

Whine Begets Wine

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Do your kids act differently with Mom and Dad? Help yourself to a glass and share your experience in the comments below.

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You may also enjoy:

You Make Road Rage So Much Fun   Willy Wonka's Fatal Mistake   That Bad, Huh?

If not, keep it down on your way out. It’s been a long day.

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25 comments

  1. livinglangston

    This exact thing happens with my kids when dad is home on his “off day”…. I miss him except when hes home & theyre extra relentless! Aww how I love family time! Xo, love your blog. Ps. Im a twin!

    Like

  2. jugglingspades

    We have 10mth old fraternal Boy/Girl twins also, and there sure is a difference when Daddy gets home from work or on weekends. The change is primarily with our daughter who brings on a whole different breakin-my-heart cry when it comes to nap times. We can totally relate to your wifes quote!

    Like

    • John Pseudonymous

      Glad to hear we’re not the only ones. It’s like they give us a break when it’s just the one parent home, but pull out all the stops when both parents are on duty. I guess the other way around would be a pain for the at-home parent, so this is probably better, but it’s definitely interesting.

      Like

  3. mamaran

    Im a stay home mommy & my son is 6.5 months old. He does precisely this already to my husband & I. Its exhausting! But he’s also just coming into the stranger-danger phase so that doesnt help much. Fortunately he does not do this ALL thebtime, only when I step out for a bit & he notices.

    Like

  4. The Next Step

    I have a 5yo and twins who are almost 3. They all whine quite a bit and I think it has more to do with sibling “rivalry” (trying to get more attention than ones sisters) than with who is with them (except the babysitter – they don’t whine AT ALL for her – she thinks they are angels).

    Like

    • John Pseudonymous

      Haha! The loudest one wins, eh? I see a little of that myself, particularly when both my son and daughter want to be held at the exact same time. It wouldn’t be so bad if they let me sit on the couch and hold them both, but they have this thing about wanting me to stand while I hold them–and that’s the only acceptable configuration. Picky.

      Like

  5. delyrn

    We have 15 month old twins, and my daughter is more whiny with me and my son is more whiny with other mommy. So we get to share the whining. Sometimes we both need that drink after bedtime.

    Like

    • John Pseudonymous

      Wow, that’s no good. Toddler sleep deprivation is the real deal. If my kids’ naps have been thrown off or if they’ve been up at night, you can bet it’ll get ugly. How do you eventually get them to crash when dad is home? Or do you?

      Like

  6. post post modern dad (@ppmdad)

    Kids definitely act different around one parent versus another. Ciaran, my 5year old, is more clingy to me than any of the other kids. Especially now that mom is working more they behave different, follow instructions different or whatever from her versus me. It’s annoying.

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    • John Pseudonymous

      Yeah, I think that’s what’s most irritating–when I’ve been trying to get the kids to listen to me and do (or not do) something all day, and then Mommy comes home, asks them to do it once, and they’re like, “Whatever you say, Mommy.”

      Thanks a lot, kids.

      Like

  7. April K

    I’ve noticed my son is more whiny when my husband (who works 70 to 90 hours a week) is home. However, he doesn’t whine to Dad; he whines to me! If Dad doesn’t let him have a thing he wants or denies him the TV, he comes running to me. Even if Dad is actively engaged in playing with him, he’ll sometimes run off to “check on Mommy.” He hasn’t quite figured out that if Dad says no, Mommy is going to say no, too!

    Like

  8. Andi-Roo (@theworld4realz)

    My 8yo daughter is much more whiny with me than with my hubz. She listens to him much better than she listens to me. But, after spending the weekend with her dad & stepmom, she is always five times as whiny with both my hubz & me! Whatever they do over there, they must be laughing it up when they send her home to us, LMAO! On her first night back home with us, we’ve been known to skip the wine & go straight for the hard liquor, haha.

    Like

    • John Pseudonymous

      That’s a bummer. Reminds me of my wife’s mom, who, whenever she’s watching our kids, says she’s going to feed them all the cotton candy they want just before giving them back to us so we can enjoy the sugar rush. It hasn’t happened yet, but it’s always hanging there in the air every time we bring them to her house.

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  9. Tyra W

    This is hilarious and interesting! I am a twin (identical girls) and when we were kids we listened to Dad and were more quiet when he was home. Even though both parents worked, mom was fair game the second she stepped in (i.e. complaining about stuff, eating any snacks she brought home) but we gave Dad space. I guess it’s in the body language and other unspoken dynamics. I suppose kids pick up on things like that.

    Like

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