Bad Places to Congregate with Your Family at Disneyland: A Non-Exhaustive List

1. Right in front of the f*cking bathroom entrance.
2. Right in front of the f*cking FastPass dispenser.
3. Right in front of the f*cking Pirates of the Caribbean exit.
4. Right in front of the f*cking place I’ve been saving for 45 minutes so my kids can see the parade.
5. Right in front of the f*cking camera shot of my wife and kids in front of the Sleeping Beauty Castle.

Disneyland Sign

Yeah. It’s the Happiest Place on Earth.


Twinfamyland: A California Adventure.

This is episode four of Twinfamyland: A California Adventure, a series chronicling the Pseudonymous Family’s legendary first pilgrimage to Disneyland.



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If not, get out of the way. People are waiting.



  1. deborah l quinn

    solution: congregate not with thy family at disney. leave thy family w/grandparents and take thy partner to a lovely inn by a lake, instead. (or at least, that’s what I’ve always done. Disney to me is the hell-ring that Dante forgot)


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