1. No, seriously, Brother John–are you sleeping or not? Because if you’re not, I’m calling 911.
2. Is anything going to be done about the strange banjo player in the kitchen with Dinah, or are we all just okay with this?
3. I still have so many questions about your ear elasticity–did you say that do hang low? And if so, do they wobble to and fro? And finally, if you don’t mind me asking, are you able to tie them in knots and/or bows?
4. Is there a maximum per customer on this Hot-Cross-Buns-for-a-penny promotion? Because if not, I’ll take a baker’s dozen.
5. Can you tell me how to actually get to Sesame Street?
I’m quite certain I missed some, O Loyal Reader, as these select few have consumed my consciousness and often keep me up at night. If you can think of any others, please add them in the comments section. Yes, that’s right, take my hand. Together, we shall blow these unsolved mysteries wide open!
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If not, tell me again about those ears of yours.