Tag: sleep deprivation
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Important Household Tasks I Can Accomplish in the Middle of the Night While Holding a Newborn Who Will Not Go to Sleep and While Also Fully Supporting Said Newborn’s Head: A Non-Exhaustive List
…in which Our Hero maximizes productivity during the wee hours of the night.
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The Tap-Dancing Butt Crack
…in which Our Hero battles sleep deprivation, tiny fists, and dirty tap-dancing tushies.
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Thesis The End
…in which Our Hero defends His dissertation from paintball snipers and Tatooine gangsters, and reveals the gender of His forthcoming child.
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Things I Did This Weekend: A Non-Exhaustive List
…in which Our Hero saves His Children from drowning, goes receipt spelunking, and fails to potty train His washing machine.
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The Jungle Gym Oracle (or, The Many Reasons Twins Are Easier Than One Kid)
…in which Our Hero rolls a mobile freak show booth through the grocery store, fields questions from twin groupies, and moves a dump truck with His bare hands.
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One Year Ago (The Creation Myth)
…in which Our Hero celebrates one year of Twinfamy and shoots the breeze with the Ghost of Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
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Keep Your Eye on the Beh
…in which Our Hero acquires new powers, teaches His Son a new word, transforms into a paint-spitting ball, and meets the creator of the Allspark.
Twinfamy 