Be Careful What You Wish Fo’

My wife and I had narrowly escaped the house with the Twins intact. We’d fed and bathed them in a hurry so we could make it on time to Thanksgiving 2: This Time, It’s Leftovers at my wife’s mother’s house, and were now en route, listening to the soothing sounds of choral squawks from the back seat over the jingle-jangle of Arizona’s perpetual Christmas music radio station.

Glancing downward at her leg, my wife felt her jeans. “My knee’s still wet from when I pulled him out of the tub and dried him,” she chuckled.

“Yeah, well, that’s better than finding poo smears on your sleeve.” I’d had to change my shirt after changing Twin diaper loads.

“Can you imagine how awesome it’s going to be when the kids can walk and we can just tell them to step out of the tub themselves?”

“Yeah, that’ll be nice.” I mused. “But that also means they’ll be able to step out of the tub whenever they want.”

“…Nuh-uh. We’ll hold them down or something.” But even she herself didn’t sound convinced.

I eyed her with a grin. “Mo’ money, mo’ problems, babe.”

Notorious B.I.G. - Mo Money Mo Problems

I do love it when the Twins call me “Big Poppa.”


You may also enjoy:

The Bubble Boy's Concession   Willy Wonka's Fatal Mistake   Whispering Meat Nothings

If not, you may have mo’ problems than you realize. Maybe you should give some of that money to me.


  1. Chunky Mama

    The worst part is that they will also be able to climb INTO the wet/full tub whenever they want. Like on Easter Sunday. When they are fully dressed, and you have 5 minutes before you have to leave for dinner at Grandma’s house. (Yes, this is experience talking.)


    • John Pseudonymous

      Wow. Yeah. Good to know. I imagine door-closing works for a little while…until they figure out how to open them. I’m sure we’ll have our own similar adventures. Luckily, I was on the USA Olympic Bathtub Swimming Team a few years back, so I’ll be able to Baywatch into action if the need arises.


  2. Pingback: Be Careful What You Wish Fo' « Twinfamy | Raising Fraternal Twins |
    • John Pseudonymous

      One thing I keep telling people (and myself) is that I’m okay with this all going slowly. Time moves so quickly anyway, so I’m not all that interested in saying “I can’t wait until…” because when I get there I know I’ll miss the good ol’ days. I try to focus on enjoying each day and not daydream about the future. If I daydream too long, I might miss something that’s happening today.


  3. Adam @ Hanging with Dad

    Everything seems like it’ll get easier when they get older. Only problem is that when they get older we’ll miss the time when they were just our little babies. It’s a tricky situation…

    That said, I am really happy that Isaac is now foot mobile rather than just crawling, it makes things easier.


    • John Pseudonymous

      It’ll definitely be nice to not have to carry them everywhere once they start walking, but I’m not all that excited about the chasing part, especially since I have two kids to chase. I’m thinking it’ll be way cheaper than a gym membership, though, so I guess that’s a plus.


  4. Phil

    Another great thing they’ll be able to do with the tub: leave it running, unbeknownst to you, until you happen to wander in just in time to see a gallon of water overflow onto the floor. Not speaking from personal experience here. Of course that’s not true… I was *that* Dad.

    I do look forward to a future largely free of poo-sleeves, however. *sigh*


    • John Pseudonymous

      On the bright side, you got a free bathroom floor mopping. So there’s that.

      Yeah, I’m sure they’ll get into all sorts of twinanigans. In no time they’ll be able to team up, and I’m a little scared of that. However, I am excited about the end of poo-sleeves. I still have a while to go, but as long as the end is coming, I’m okay with hanging in there.

      And changing shirts three times a day.


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