I was recently asked by the fantasmic people at WordPress to
board a helicopter to their secret volcano lair and participate in a roundtable discussion with other blogging parents regarding our expertise on the subject, an endeavor for which I was well prepared, as I also happen to be an expert on my own expertise.
We had some laughs, some scrumdiddlyumptious WordPress-logo-shaped bacon-wrapped scallops, and an excellent conversation about the labor of love that is family-flavored blogging.
This historic meeting has resulted in a series of WordPress “Daily Posts,” the first of which is titled Mommy and Daddy Bloggers Shoot the Poop: Part One, and is now available here for your reading pleasure.
Thanks to Michelle W. and WordPress for inviting me
to their volcano to participate, and to my fellow roundtablers not only for their thoughtful responses, but also for not getting mad at me for eating all of the scallops.
I had low blood sugar, I swear.
I’ll admit it. I’ve been holding out on you, O Loyal Reader.
I’ve strived to keep it a secret for as long as I’ve been writing this fine publication, but I can no longer do so because the cat has clawed its way out of the bag.
My true identity has been discovered and reported on a highly reputable media outlet, and I feel it’s necessary for me to just come clean before the rumor mill spins out of control, granting itself flight like an impossibly heavy helicopter.
You see, I’m not just John Pseudonymous, mild-mannered stay-at-home father, Ph. D. student, and inspiration to kajillions.
I’m also a superhero.
I go by the superhero handle Elasto-Dad. You probably haven’t heard of my exploits as I’ve attempted to keep a low profile, privately using my powers for good in my own home, particularly in twin-wrangling scenarios.
However, just a few days ago, a team of paparazzi somehow tracked me down and snapped voyeuristic photos through the windows of my house. I was able to destroy all of these photos before any were leaked because, as you know, I am a ninja, and therefore my keen reflexes alerted me in time to ambush them and beat them with their own footwear.