Good News/Bad News: Please Excuse My Children for Calling You an Ass

Good News: The Twins have a new favorite game, the classic bubonic-plague-inspired “Ring Around the Rosie,” which they not only enthusiastically sing and play themselves, but also have their legion of Fisher Price Little People perform.

"Ashes, ashes..."

It’s the only time the Dark Knight and the Joker set aside their differences and join hands.

Whenever we’re out running errands, they sing it uncontrollably, as the song is constantly in their heads. They often get stuck in an endless loop of their favorite lyric, “Ashes, ashes.” It is adorable.

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Bad News: Their toddler-esque pronunciation of this line sounds remarkably like a certain body part, resulting in the booming, sing-songy repetition of “Asses, asses,” up and down grocery store aisles, while waiting for our food in restaurants, and, of course, in the middle of church.

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You may also enjoy:

Crayon on the Cob   Losing My Head   Jingo Bezz

If not, the Twins would like to sing you a song…

About John Pseudonymous

Stay-at-home trophy husband & father of 2-year-old fraternal boy/girl twins; writer of Twinfamy, the epic parenting and humor blog; PhD student; undiscovered rock star

Posted on January 9, 2013, in Family, Good News/Bad News, Humor, Hyperreality, Parenting, SAHD, Stay At Home Dad, Twins and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 38 Comments.

  1. Could be worse. My 2 year old keeps singing the first two lines of Jingle Bells. Every day. Loudly.

  2. It’s better than the very loud proclamation that mommy has “BOOBIES” in church!

  3. ACTUALLY…. A couple of weeks ago our toddler wanted to nurse during mass. After being denied, he loudly started saying “Nipple!” over and over again.

  4. From the mouths of babes…my daughter is currently not vocalizing the word “stuck” quite correctly right now…and it’s coming out like “f@”$k”! It took me a while to realise what she was trying to say, talk about embarrassing in public!

  5. LOL! When our middle son was very young and had just learned what that thing was called that was between his legs, and that only boys have it, he said in a loud voice in the middle of a crowded store to my wife: “I have a penis, and you don’t, huh mommy!?”

    Russ

    • Nice! My kids are particularly concerned with body parts since they notice that each of them have different equipment, so now, whenever it’s bath time, we make sure to clear up who has what. Good times.

  6. Just wait. They’ll be doing it on purpose soon enough.

  7. Awesome! Ah, to relive my twins lives two years behind where they are now. Thanks for that! :)

  8. Thank goodness. I thought was wondering how those kids were able to tell what a horrible person I am just by looking at me.

  9. I could have used those Fischer Price Little People last night. I was trying to figure out how eight people were going to get on and off stage during a number.

  10. Meh. Ashes. Asses. Sounds adorable either way. :P

  11. Yeah, my kids take inordinate amounts of pleasure torturing me – especially in public places! Ah, to be two again…

  12. Ohh but those are the days, toddler speak is adorable. Teen speak , not so good , thats when they will call someone an A@# and mean it.

  13. When my daughter says frog it sounds like she is saying a certain F word and considering her new favorite animal is a frog she says it often. We had a very shocked looking Grandad the other day :).

  14. and p.s. My little madam loves her fisher price Batman toys too! we don’t have Joker yet but we do have Robin xD,

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